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CHICKEN

Monday 08-25-2008 7:06am PT

On Saturday morning a free-range chicken came to our house. It was a rooster and it was unexpected. So what do you offer a wayward rooster that unexpectedly arrives for a visit? Instant oatmeal.

TELL YOUR FRIENDS

Friday 08-22-2008 8:13am PT

As we approach the end of the 2008 Beijing Olympics, two things strike me: 1) Beijing's crappy air hasn't been too bad 2) Some people have learned how to pronounce Beijing while others prefer to pretend it's French.

So, one mo time, I'd like to present two experts on the subject.

EYES

Wednesday 08-20-2008 5:20pm PT

I left my glasses at home. That was stupid.

WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS DOES NOT STAY IN VEGAS

Monday 08-11-2008 12:26pm PT

I'm in Las Vegas this week. We're gonna go to a couple of shows. Later in the week we're going to meet a cop and a guy in the movie business and go to Lake Mead and hope not to get infected with that nasty amoeba that gets in your nose, eats your brain and kills you. It's scary and has been around forever, but it's just the chance you must take in order to have fun in Southern California's source for drinking water.

We own a few time shares. We are staying in a Hilton time share in Las Vegas. My wife, Julie ,is modeling in the kitchen with the heavy suitcase. Please note that we have every light in the place on.

I'm relaxing in the bath tub.

And our 11 year old son, Chad, has grown up.

Chad has always lived on the edge and has decided to enhance his image with the girls. He is pictured here with a cream soda and an "El Diablo" bubble gum cigarette. Yes, the gum makers are trying to get kids to smoke and the cream soda makers are trying to get them to drink beer.

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